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Curtain Razor
Directed by Friz Freleng

“Act, schmact! I’m the janitor!”; animation by Manuel Perez
Release Date:
May 21, 1949
Main Character(s):
Porky Pig
Summary:
Porky Pig is a talent agent for the “Goode and Korny Talent Agents” and auditions several acts that either go wrong or don’t go the way Porky expected. He is periodically pestered by a fox who claims he has the greatest act of the century.
That’s Not All, Folks:
The production number is 1081 and was released as a Looney Tune.
The cartoon is a precursor of sorts to the iconic “Show Biz Bugs” (1957; also directed by Freleng) in that a few of the acts are reused in that cartoon and has the same ending punchline.
On the Looney Tunes Super Stars Porky and Friends Hilarious Ham DVD set, this cartoon is in place of where “Nothing But the Tooth” (which still has yet to be restored) would’ve been, hence the order of the cartoons on that set.
Interestingly, Gerry Chiniquy didn’t animate on this one despite the fact that he was still at the studio during this time before he left for a few years.
The title is a pun on “curtain raiser”.
The Bing Crosby parrot in this cartoon resembles the one from “Catch As Cats Can”.
The calendar in Porky’s office by the door appears to have some sort of pin-up on its page.
This is the last cartoon to use the 1948-1949 green rings with the red background.
The cartoon was used in the 1983 compilation movie, “Daffy Duck’s Movie: Fantastic Island”.
The turtle in this cartoon who claims to be the “Man of a Thousand Voices” is a parody of Mel Blanc, who because of his versatility, was also known as that. Interestingly, that description was also used in the Beatles song, “The Fool on the Hill” (1967), sung by Paul McCartney: “The man of a thousand voices talking perfectly loud”.
What I Like About This One:
A loud, bombastic operatic voice is heard over the opening credits and shaking the whole waiting room in the agency with a few lines being said in the middle of the opera such as “I wowed ‘em in Waukegan!; I slayed ‘em in Scranton!; I panicked ‘em in Peoria!” When the door opens, the operatic voice is shown to come from a grasshopper who ends with saying, “I killed ‘em in Cu-camonga” (animated by Manuel Perez).
The next act Porky auditions is a hen clucking in tune to the Blue Danube but she makes a surprised squawk at one point as she just so happened to lay an egg at the time. “So I laid an egg”, she says before starting to walk out. Unamused, Porky pulls the trap door out from under her. Just before the egg falls into the trap door, a Tweety lookalike pops its head out of the shell and waves a sad “bye-bye” (animated by Virgil Ross).
After the fox interrupts the first time with Porky having to dismiss him by telling him to wait his turn, to which the fox grumbles under his breath about (animated by Ross), the next audition is a turtle with Mel Blanc’s actual voice and who claims to be “the man of a thousand voices”. After doing an all-out performance with the voices of Bugs Bunny, Senator Claghorn (the inspiration behind Foghorn Leghorn), Rochester, and Jimmy Durante among others overlapping at once, he is out of breath. Porky points out that that was only 999 voices. The turtle walks out scratching his head in confusion: “Shucks, I know I’ve got another one. Well, I’ll think of it” (animated by Pete Burness).
“Bingo” (a Bing Crosby parrot), “Frankie” (a Frank Sinatra rooster), and “Al” (an Al Jolson crow) give out with a performance of “April Showers”, with them all singing certain parts (and Frankie’s microphone swooning after Frankie sings his line) solo before singing in unison at the end (animated by Ken Champin). They all walk out with Porky telling them, “I’ll-I’ll let you know if anything comes up”, but upon shutting the door, reveals his actual thoughts: “Th-th-that’s really not high class enough! S-s-strictly for those s-silly s-s-swooning bobbysoxers!” (animated by Perez)
A two-headed man walks in, which Porky is excited about. “Boy! T-t-two-headed! Th-this ought to be a sensational act!” Both heads reply in annoyed unison as they empty out the trash, “Act, schmact! I’m the janitor!” (animated by Perez)
After a second interruption from the fox, a dog who is wearing an old-fashioned swimsuit and talks like a carnival barker comes in with him explaining everything: “Hadding’s the name. J. Fenton Hadding. I’ll show ya what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna place this suitcase upon the floor. Then, I’m gonna open the suitcase.” Said suitcase has a rising platform inside as he continues, “I’m going to seat myself upon this unique platform and I’m gonna manipulate this lever and I’m gonna zoom into the air,” He rises it out of the skylight, “I’m gonna soar upward to the stratospheric heights; 500 feet above sea level. I’m gonna take my stance upon the position of the platform’s edge”. After getting into a diving position, he asides, “Note the perfect form” before jumping off. “And I’m gonna dive into the air. I’m gonna dive. Not into a tank of water. Not into a bucket of water. No. I’ll tell ya what I’m gonna dive into. An ordinary drinking glass. Observe”. He puts the glass on the bottom of the floor (all the while holding it) just seconds before he gets stuffed into the glass. Porky sends him through the trap door (animated by Ross).
The next act is “Crawford Coo and His Trained Pigeons”, where Crawford sets up a miniature circus for his pigeons, but they all fly out the window the second Crawford opens their door. Embarrassed, Crawford attempts to do a dance instead, but he too is given the trap door (animated by Perez).
The next time the fox comes in, he asks, “Why waste your time with these other crumbs when opportunity is practically banging your door down? I got the act you’ve been looking for all your life!” Porky pulls the lever for the trap door, which the fox steps away from upon realizing he’s standing on it, but he falls through another one instead (animated by Ross).
A very shaggy sheepdog comes in, to which Porky assumes this is going to be a dog act. The sheepdog reveals that he’s not the one presenting the act: “Nope. My card, sir.” He’s revealed to be the dog that is home to “Itch and Scratch. World’s Most Famous Flea Circus”. He blows a whistle and his fleas all come out and set up a literal tiny circus. The dog blows the whistle again, so they pack it up, and go back into him, as the dog walks out (animated by Champin with Perez animating the shots of Porky).
With it now finally being the fox’s turn, he excitedly runs out and returns dressed in a devil suit. He drinks atomic powder, TNT, and gasoline before lighting a match and swallowing it. The fox explodes and disappears. Porky agrees that the act really is terrific. The fox’s spirit walks in and laments, “Yeah. But there’s just one tiny little thing wrong with it. I can only do it once” (animated by Ross)
Where Can I Watch It?
At archive.org!
Carrot Rating:
🥕🥕🥕🥕